I was chatting with T earlier today about landscaping my yard. In comparison to her yard and J’s yard, my yard looks awful. My grass is brown since I don’t water it, and I am getting those horrendous Northwest dandelions, which are the ugliest things I’ve ever seen, all over my enormous side yard. So how do I get rid of them, you ask?? I mow them down every few weeks. That’s about all I CAN do, because if I chose to use Roundup on them, I’d have to invest some serious stock in Roundup to be able to afford enough to kill all these damned dandelions.
I want a couple of cuttings of T’s gorgeous hydrangea for my yard, and I’m thinking of how to make my yard more landscaped and less just… there. I shared with her some of my ideas on what I want to do, but then I told her that I was going to wait till Kurt gets home. Not that I can’t do it myself, but this is HIS first home too, and I know he’s stoked about working on the house and yard too. I don’t want to take ALL the fun away from him. Plus I need his manliness. :o)
So I was really floored when T just sort of grumbled, “Yeah, but you’ll end up doing it yourself.”
I must have the world’s most unique marriage in the world, I’m telling you. Just because T’s husband has a tendency of not getting home projects done because he’s hella lazy (they’ve been putting hardwood floors down in their home for as long as I’ve lived here, and apparently for even longer than that) doesn’t mean that Kurt has the same mentality. T ends up doing far more than her fair share of the home improvement chores she and her husband decide to tackle. And that’s with full-time care of a very precocious and energetic three-year-old.
It also helps that Kurt and I don’t look at our marriage as a way to dominate one another. He doesn’t LET me do things and I don’t ALLOW him to do things. We work together on everything. People joke about their wives having them whipped (which was the topic on the morning show on the radio this morning), but I don’t have Kurt whipped. He knows not to do things that would hurt or annoy me, but it goes the other way too — I don’t do things to hurt or annoy him. That’s just plain old consideration for the other person, is all.
A lot of wives would be nervous with their husbands thousands of miles away, especially on a co-ed ship in the middle of the ocean with nothing to do. And I know Kurt’s got some really close female friends on the ship, but I know better than to worry about him cheating on me. He wouldn’t do it because it would hurt me. Just like I wouldn’t cheat on my husband, who’s thousands of miles away, because it would hurt him. Besides that, I’m just not attracted to any of the men I know out here. :o)
Kurt and I are the best team we possibly can be. If I want to landscape the yard, he’ll help me do it and not hole up in the computer room to avoid helping me. If he wants to replace some of the circuitry in the house, I’ll help him as best I can and not just sit on my bum shouting orders at him. Kurt wasn’t put on this earth to be my personal servant, as some people like to think. The people that do think that are just jealous that their relationship with their spouse isn’t as good as Kurt’s and my relationship.
I just wonder why some of the folks I know out here are even married. They and their spouses are just so different I wonder how they even work out. Fortunately, since my friends are older, they’re too stubborn to allow divorce to enter into the equation, unlike most folks my age who think that divorce is just the logical end to a couple years of marriage.
Thank God Kurt and I don’t think like that! :o)