Most days I don’t bother to turn on the tv until Kurt gets home from work. I used to turn it on religiously every morning to GSN (formerly Game Show Network), but then they changed their morning programming. They also started showing episodes of the “new” “Let’s Make a Deal,” which was far less amusing than the original. Being a creature of habit, I couldn’t get into the new scheduling, especially since the episodes of “Let’s Make a Deal” from the 1970s where really what I was looking forward to each morning. Plus I realized I had it on simply for noise, and Grace really didn’t need to be watching that much television every day.
Now I wait till Grace asks me to put on the radio before I start having any noise at all. The radio isn’t much better than the tv; Grace is learning some lyrics that probably aren’t very toddler-appropriate. Anyone heard “Psycho” by Puddle of Mudd?? It starts out with “Maybe I’m the one / maybe I’m the one / who is / the schizophrenic psycho.” Whoops.
Of course, I could listen to Radio Disney or some such, but I am not nearly awake enough to deal with the saccharine nature of today’s teenyboppers. Besides, I was listening to the Beastie Boys’ “Fight For Your Right to Party” (which includes the lines “Man, living at home is such a drag / Now your mom threw away your best porno mag”) when I was in the first grade, and I turned out just fine.
Once I go to put on my makeup and dry my hair, I tend to put on the tv in the bedroom for background noise. Lately I’ve been on a Food Network kick, so that’s what the tv is tuned to at the moment. There was a show on that featured some really delicious recipes, and when I finished getting ready, I put Food Network on in the living room. The more I watched, the more I decided I wanted to try the recipes.
Off to Foodnetwork.com I went… and spoiled a show for myself.
See, on Saturday, we were waiting for our friend to come by with her kids so we could all go to the pool. The Food Network was showing a rerun of their show “The Next Food Network Star,” and Kurt and I really got into it. That particular episode featured the five contestants that were left appearing on the “Rachael Ray Show” in front of a live studio audience with a little Girl Scout Brownie helper. We would critique how well we thought each contestant was doing, and then discuss whether we agreed with the judges or not.
I decided it would be a good idea to put the latest episode of “The Next Food Network Star” on the DVR so we could fast-forward through the commercials. However, we didn’t get around to watching it last night, just after it started. Instead we got rid of other things that were clogging up on the DVR.
So this morning when I went to investigate the recipes that I were seeing on that cooking show, I was blasted with a huge graphic on which contestant had gotten booted off last night. Gahhh! Couldn’t they wait a little bit, or had a link saying, “Click here to discuss the latest contestant to leave the show!” instead of having it front and center on the homepage?
Now I know who’s getting kicked off, and I still haven’t seen the episode. That sucks.
But these recipes!! They look so delicious. One is an Asian-themed dish, though it just uses Asian elements instead of being thoroughly Asian. It calls for sake as one of the ingredients. I asked Kurt if he thought it would be appropriate if I asked our Japanese neighbor across the street if I could have a half-cup of her sake, but he pointed out that it would involve talking to her husband — which is really more than I can stomach most days. I decided it would just be easier to get my own sake at the package store on base.
I also realized I should get some red wine for cooking as well, but this time I was smart. I bought the four mini-bottles instead of the one 750ml bottle so that it stays fresher longer. It’s a shame because I love buying the wine from the local vineyard, but I just can’t use a whole bottle of wine before it goes bad since I can’t be drinking it.
Another recipe I found this morning calls for rum as well. I investigated the rum selection at the package store and was amazed by all the varieties. I knew I couldn’t get Captain Morgan’s; Kurt hates the stuff. But now they have a zillion types of Captain’s Morgan’s. And there’s Parrot Bay too, the coconut-flavored stuff. And watermelon-flavored rum, and light rum, and a darker rum, and all kinds of rum! What do you get?
I was going to get the off-brand rum, the stuff that was going for $7 for a 750ml bottle. But then I realized that Bacardi was just $12 for the same bottle, and I might actually want to drink the stuff after I popped this baby out. I grabbed the bottle of Bacardi, and took my wine, the rum, and the sake up to the counter to pay for it, laughing to myself the whole way that all this alcohol was just for cooking.
The cashier took a look at my 750ml bottle and said, “You know the bigger bottle is on sale for just $3 more???” When I tried to demur, saying that it was just for cooking, the cashier looked at me like I had three heads. And then I realized, What the heck? I won’t be pregnant forever. I’ll be able to have a few rum & Pepsis soon enough!
That’s when Kurt piped up and said, “Besides, we know enough drunks that we can donate the extra rum to them!”
The thing is, I hadn’t seen the enormous sale sign on the shelf saying that the large bottle of Bacardi was just $15. I only saw the tiny pricetag on the shelf next to the enormous sale sign that read “$18.” Duh.
I still am giggling on the inside that the cashier was adamant that I get the larger bottle, since it was the better deal. Selling an obviously pregnant lady alcohol! Now that just made my day.