The Mind of Bluesleepy

Falling into autumn 17 September 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bluesleepy @ 10:23 pm

You know, this whole hormone thing can just go suck it already.  Everything has been affecting me so much more than it should.  I get upset so easily, and I tend to react too strongly.  I know it’s because I just gave birth eight days ago, but enough already.

I would like to wave my magic wand and go back to my even-keeled self.  It’s too exhausting to exist on a seesaw like this, and to have my emotions seem like they’re spiraling out of control.  It’s bad enough that I’m still healing physically; I’m frustrated that I have to heal emotionally as well.

So that’s that.


Terri T. over at My5Cents has been talking about fall over on her blog.  I am so ready for it to be fall.  It’s my absolutely favorite season of all.  For me, nothing can beat the crisp, cool air, the scent of leaves being burnt wafting on the breeze, the weaker sunlight slanting through the changing colors of the leaves.

We’re getting a few teases here and there.  We’ve had the air conditioning off for several days in a row now.  The highs have only been in the low 70s, and occasionally in the 60s.  At night it’s going down into the 50s, and on Thursday night the low is forecasted to be 49º.  I wore a sweater yesterday over a three-quarter length shirt and was perfectly comfortable for much of the day.  This morning I woke up, snuggled under my comforter, reveling in the chill that was just outside my bedcovers.

It really made it difficult to haul myself out of bed to feed the baby when she began fussing at 7am this morning.  Kurt had set up a bottle for me and left it on my dresser, which meant I didn’t have to be outside the covers for long.  I grabbed the baby and snuggled with her underneath my covers as I fed her so we could both stay warm.

Don’t worry — we have Mary Ellen well-insulated against the chill.  She wears a onesie and a gown to bed, and we swaddle her in a heavyweight swaddling blanket.  We even make sure she’s got a hat on when she sleeps.  It was really cold in my hospital room; the nurses kept the temperatures in the 60s.  So Mary Ellen is sort of used to how cool it is in the house.

I noticed tonight during dinner that the sun has moved.  All summer long, it’s been blinding me on occasion as we eat our meal, especially if we’ve had the door open to let in the breeze.  Tonight the sun was coming in through the door on the left, instead of the door on the right like it has throughout the summer.

I’ve been hearing evening colors sounding earlier and earlier.  It seemed like the whole summer long, sunset was not until well after 8pm, where tonight we heard colors being played before it was even 7pm.  It won’t be long till the sun sets closer to 5pm.

Fall is coming.  We’re just not quite there yet.

I’m really looking forward to this winter as well.  The Farmer’s Almanac had predicted that we’re to get a colder than normal winter, and I sure hope that happens.

Heh.  Listen to me.  Come January, I’ll probably be whining about the frigid temperatures.  But right now, I’m excited.

Last winter, it was fairly mild here.  Providence and Boston got hammered with the snow and the cold, but here on the island we were well-insulated from all of that.  It’s like we’re on some weird warm-water flow that keeps us very mild and temperate.  I’m a bit disappointed because we live in New England, for crying out loud.  It would be nice to experience an actual New England winter.

To that end, I bought Grace a heavier coat than she had last year.  It’s a brown poofy coat with Hello Kitty designs all over it.  I found it for just $20 at TJ Maxx.  I still have my faux fur and suede coat that Kurt bought me as a total surprise when he was underway a couple of years ago.  I never really was able to wear it very often in Washington, since Seattle experiences such mild winters, so if I could use it this year, it would be awesome.  Of course, buying a new heavy coat for Grace probably means that we’ll sail through the winter barely hitting freezing.  Murphy’s Law, you know.

In other news, I think I have finally turned a corner on my recovery from childbirth.  I can’t remember the last time I took my Motrin.  About the only thing that I notice now is when I first lay flat on my back in bed every night, it can be a while before my back relaxes enough for me to lay comfortably.  Sometimes it’s so tight that it causes me a fair amount of pain for about ten or fifteen minutes.  Most of the time I’m so into my book that I’m able to focus on what I’m reading and block out the pain until my back loosens up.

I’m down fifteen pounds already.  I’m not too worried about what the scale is reading; I just want to get back into my size 16 jeans.  I know it’ll be a while, but it’s encouraging to me that I’m down to needing to lose just fifteen more pounds already.  I’m just so sick of my maternity clothes; I really want to get back into my pre-pregnancy clothes again.  Once I’m totally healed, I’ll be walking more to get my weight down because I really want to get back in the clothes I was wearing before.  Besides, I’m tired of wearing an extra-large.  If I can get into a large over the next few months, I’ll be thrilled.

And now this entry has taken me several hours to write (lack of inspiration coupled with tons of distraaction), so I think it’s best if I sign off while I’m already behind.  Take care of yourselves.


9 Responses to “Falling into autumn”

  1. sleepyjane Says:

    We’re just saying goodbye to winter here and while it’s still a little chilly, the afternoons are nice and toasty. I’m quite read for summer though even if our winter wasn’t that bad.

  2. becca Says:

    The mornings seem extra cold here too all of a sudden. We never really had a good summer so I am expecting a harsh winter. Yuk. Hope you feel more hormonally balanced soon too. ((((hugs to you and your beautiful girls))))))x

  3. purple chai Says:

    Fall has come to our mornings as well. Love it.

  4. michele Says:

    i don’t know if this will help or if you can take it anyway, but i recently stumbled upon a formulation of a Bach Flower Remedy that comes in the form of “pastilles”. They’re chewy but they have a black currant flavor that’s really good. Since it’s homeopathic, I thought maybe you’d be able to take them…

    And believe me.. I *totally* get how you feel.. Not feeling “balanced” really sucks monkey nutz. Hope you’re back to your chipper, even-keeled self really soon!

  5. andrea Says:

    Do you remember all of my bitching about the snow last winter? Snow from December 2 through April??? It was Maine’s worst winter in 30 odd years! I am keeping my fingers crossed for a mild one this time. But hey, when we get a classic nor’easter, you are more than welcome to come up and ride it out with me. 🙂

    I’m glad your recovery is going so well. As for everything else, yes, you JUST gave birth so be gentle on yourself.

  6. Shear Says:

    It’s getting cooler in southwest Mississippi too! 62 degrees at 6 a.m. with a high of 83 today. That’s great news for our electricity bill…finally.

    I remember those horrible post-pregnancy hormones. It really does suck ass.

    You WILL feel better soon! You’re doing great and looking wonderful as always.

  7. Blue Opal Says:

    The only difference here is it’s no longer in the 100’s daytime. Yay for that! And hang in there – the hormonal seesaw won’t last much longer *hugs*

  8. terri t. Says:

    Guess part of those hormones being out of whack is that you are impatient! LOL. I think you are doing amazingly well after just a few days since childbirth. I hope you get the winter you want but it doesn’t last so long that you get tired of it.
    Great news about Mary Ellen’s kidneys and so on. And it sounds like you have a lot of baby fans who want to see that precious little girl.
    Our temps were low too but now we are having a beautiful week with temps back in the high 70’s and cool nights. Yummy!

  9. Aimee Says:

    I love the fall too. But I friggen hate cold cold winters. Uggg.
    Sorry about the hormones. It does suck. It even sucks to have the milder PMS ones that make you feel out of wack and crazy. It will be better soon. And your hubby knows so he will survive if you threaten to beat him with a skillet for no reason every now and then.

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